Stress Myths: We need to manage stress

*MYTH #4: We need to manage stress, not to make it go away*

FACT: This is actually quite a dangerous myth. When we think that the best way to deal with stress is to manage it instead of eliminating it, we are basically saying that stress is a part of life.

Many stress experts talk about positive benefits of exercise, meditation, and relaxation techniques, but may not inform you of the *negative side* to these same coping strategies.

You see, using exercise, meditation and so on as stress management techniques are often ineffective. They are very poor strategies for dealing with certain types of problems, such as the death in the family, retrenchment or rejection. Also, these exercises take up a lot of time. Worse, the effects usually last a short while and you might have to keep doing them a few times in a day.

But really, the worse thing about it is the fact that dealing only with the symptoms of stress does absolutely nothing to cure the underlying ills. As long as we do not deal with the underlying causes, stress will persist and maybe even get worse.

So, if you think you are "managing" your stress well, think again.

Stress Myths: Stress can be dealt with directly

Here is an interesting myth about stress:

*MYTH #2: Stress is something we can cope with or deal with directly.*

FACT: Stress is not something you, I, or anyone else can cope with directly.

What does this actually mean? You see, contrary to popular belief, stress is not some "thing" that exists or afflicts us like a disease.

"Stress" actually refers to a situation or a state of mind that is a result of some other problems or conflicts. In other words, to deal with stress, we need to deal with these causal issues rather than try to deal with the "concept" of stress.

This means we have all been trained to think about stress incorrectly. Instead of asking "what can I do to cope with my stress?" you should be asking yourself "what specific problems or conflicts are troubling me, and how can I deal with each of these problems effectively?"

In this way, we will find that stress becomes much more manageable and we have specific actions that we can take.

Stress Myths: Stress in inevitable

*MYTH #1: Stress is inevitable--there's little we can do to prevent or eliminate it.*

FACT: Stress is not an inevitable part of life. Many people do lead stress-free lives. When exposed to identical situations, some people experience high degrees of stress while others experience little or none. More importantly, it is possible to change yourself from "high-stress" to "low- stress" individuals.

How can we accomplish this feat? Clearly, it is not because they were born this way, or they wouldn't have become stressed in the first place. How about luck, the amount of schooling they received, or a sudden religious conversion?

While religious conversions do take place, the majority of people who change themselves from high-stress to low-stress individuals do so by acquiring a new type of KNOWLEDGE. Not the type of knowledge they learned in school, but knowledge that allows them to correct many of the myths and misconceptions other people believe.

As Richard Ecker points out in his 1985 book /The Stress Myth/: "We like to believe that stress is inevitable--that life is so complex these days, that we're being dragged along by a runaway world which offers us less and less that we can depend on. But this belief is nothing but a myth, a myth that has done more to perpetuate stress in our society than any other single factor."

Ecker goes on to say, *"Ironically, the main proponents of this myth are the very same ones who claim to be teaching people how to deal with stress!"*

What Ecker says is unfortunately true. Most of what we've been taught about stress--including what it is, what causes it to occur, and how we should cope with it--is based upon inaccurate, out-dated theories that are no longer accepted by twentieth-century thinkers.

The good news is that once you learn to recognize these myths, and once you correctly understand what stress is and what really causes it to occur, you can prevent or eliminate much of the stress you ordinarily experience.

Live a healthy life. Start with a healthy diet, and learn more about how you can enjoy life.